It's not that your child is incapable of listening to you, it's that they choose not to because they don't trust you. Trying to get an "Aspie" to do something won't happen. They have to want to do it on their own, and the best thing you can do is reframe your approach. 

Explain to them WHY doing something will be beneficial for THEM. They have to trust that you are on their side, not someone trying to manipulate them into doing something you want them to do. See if you can incorporate their passions into this as a way to ignite their interest.

For more, we highly suggest you go through our Deep Into Defense Mode course yourself, and implement the advice within.